Shift Happens: When the Load Gets Heavier and You Still Have to Keep Showing Up

There’s a version of working parenthood that people talk about often: the logistics.

The scheduling.
The exhaustion.

But there’s another layer that emerges over time, one that’s harder to quantify.

The emotional weight of being needed everywhere, and for everyone.
The pressure of continuing to lead while quietly carrying more.
The realization that nobody is coming to “fix” the overwhelm – you just learn how to move through it differently.

Josie’s Shift Happens series asked leaders: 

How do you keep showing up when everyone needs something from you?

Their answers were about perspective. About boundaries. About redefining success. About learning what actually matters when life gets heavier.

Below are their full reflections.

Alexa Starks

Founder, Executive Moms | Editor-in-Chief, Mothered Magazine

How do you manage the guilt that often comes when a career acceleration phase overlaps with a demanding season of parenting?

I try to keep two things in mind. The first is that it’s just a season. The acceleration phase might take some time to adjust to a new workload or learning new projects and process, but then it will even out and regulate. This season may require more focus on your work, maybe your partner needs to step up at home a bit more, but then it’ll balance out again.

Maybe you’re a little more exhausted this season trying to manage both work and parenting, so find any extra support that can also help take some pressure off of you. Whether that’s your partner pitching in more, or relatives helping, outsourcing even grocery delivery or meal delivery and cleaning so it’s one less thing to do. It’s just a season, whether it’s a few weeks or a quarter, it will change and you will find your rhythm again. 

The second is to pick your priorities and nonnegotiables. What is most important for you to protect and not miss at home, and at work? Maybe you want to be present for dinner and bedtime, so you choose to get up a little earlier in the morning to prep for your work day and get a head start so you can be at home with your kids in the evening.

Figure out what is most important in this season and work to prioritize and protect it. 

 

Lisa Kaplowitz

Co-Founder + Executive Director, Rutgers Center for Women in Business

What was the biggest identity shift you experienced during family planning and expansion, and how did it unexpectedly change your perspective on leadership?

After having our children, I gave myself permission to receive and ask for help. There literally are not enough hours in the day to ‘do it all’ and I realized that the superwoman is the one who leverages her team, at work and at home.

 

Harris Fanaroff

Founder, Linked Revenue

How do you handle the emotional pressure of managing your child’s world (activities, social life, hobbies) without letting it compromise your performance at work or your presence at home?

First off, you have to be as lucky as me to have a superwoman as their mom.

I don’t think you ever fully “handle” it, you just get better at prioritizing what actually matters. A lot of it comes down to being really clear on where I can be fully present and where I need to let go of perfection.My background as an athlete definitely helps. You learn quickly how to compartmentalize, reset after a bad play, and focus on what’s in front of you instead of carrying everything at once.

I have A LOT to learn still and I’m nowhere close to perfect but I do try to get better every day at being a dad just like as an athlete and work.

 

Javaree Walker

Founder, Ready To Dad

How has being a parent fundamentally changed your definition of success, and does that new definition actually make you more effective?

Becoming a parent changed my definition of success from achieving more to being more present, more aligned, and more available. Before, success meant what looked good; now it means building a life that more accurately reflects my values and lets me show up well for the people who need me most.

That shift has made me more effective. When I got clearer on what genuinely matters, I stopped leaking energy toward things that felt urgent but weren’t deeply meaningful.

 

Bosky Mukherjee

Founder, SheTrailblazes

When faced with a major life event, like an unexpected diagnosis, a loss, or a big move, what is your immediate survival protocol to protect your mental health while staying professional?

For me, trying to “stay positive” made everything worse.

When my son needed emergency open heart surgery and my revenue went to zero last year, my brain kept running worst-case scenarios anyway… just in the background, all day.

So I stopped trying to avoid it after months of spiralling. 

I sat down and actually mapped out the worst case, the best case, and a few versions in between including going back to corporate after 7 years.

Once it was on paper, my mind got quieter and I started to see things clearly. It gave me clarity. 

Then I could actually start moving instead of just sitting in it.

The shift for me was realizing… the thing you’re avoiding is usually the thing keeping you anxious.

 

 

These reflections aren’t about balance. They’re about a willingness to redefine success.

To ask for help.
To let go of perfection.
To stop pretending capacity is infinite.
To recognize that leadership and caregiving are constantly reshaping each other in real time.

Because sometimes the transition isn’t the event itself, it’s the person you become while learning how to carry it.